Night Owl

Once, I was part of a clinical trial in which I had to self-report my energy and sleep habits; they were determining where I fell on the scale of “morning lark / night owl.” The options were — and I’m not kidding here — Extreme Lark, Lark, Slight Lark, Neutral, Slight Owl, Owl, Extreme Owl.

I answered everything as honestly and objectively as I could, and at the end they tallied up my score and told me that I was so much of an Extreme Owl that I almost hit the end of the scale, and that so far nobody else in the clinical trial had come close.

(I don’t think they were supposed to tell me that part, but whatever.)

I’m not surprised. I actually function really well late at night, and I wish that more of society worked on that schedule. It seems that the only way I could get a job working on that schedule would be a job that I really didn’t want, and it would put a major dent in the social life that I want — because most of my friends are slight owl at best.

I’d be perfectly content sleeping until 11:00 or even noon, working from 1:00 to 10:00, and staying up until 3:00 or 4:00am (oh, who am I kidding, I’d stay up until 6 some “nights”)… but I’d never get to hang out with most of my friends and family.

Except, apparently, Sage, who has definitely not wanted to sleep during the nighttime hours this week.

Sage, it’s never too early to learn that sometimes even our own body rhythms have to be sacrificed for the good of society. In this case, for you, “society” means your parents.

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